Polyamori

If you happen to be a married couple in San Salvador, El Salvador, and the husband would like to see me have sex with his wife, that idea sounds very fun to me.
Also girls with an open mind that have kinky fetishes, like orgies, cum swapping, bukkake, or gangbangs.  I can make your wildest fantasies come true.
Contact me at miltruiz506@hotmail.com.  Please no time wasters, only people that want to make the sexy time.

A little comedic script that I'm working on. Very rough draft; but I think it has potential.

I have these very crazy ideas when I'm episodic because I can't sleep; but I also can't turn off my brain. This is a tale I haven't quite hashed out. The main theme is redemption; but it should be comedic. Now the protagonist is not a hero or even an antihero he's basically just a morally reprehensible person; but on the day that the story begins his fairy godmother appears to him and tells him "you must make a baby soon, for the Future of the World depends on it." Now after saying that, the fairy godmother just disappears, she doesn't so much as introduce the guy to the girl he should make the baby with, so he just starts going on blind dates. The body of the story is the guy's adventures as he meets and escapes from the wrong girls. The first girl is a cyborg murderbot from The Future (think Terminator 3), the second girl has a vagina dentata, the third one is just an insufferable bitch. So then, after barely escaping termination, emasculation, and nagging to death, he meets this girl, that maybe was the girl next door, and he makes a baby with her and saves the world, because the Future depends on it, and that baby is gonna be the girl that destroys all the murderbot cyborgs.

Kamela

I picke up Kamela in Berkeley in the 60's on San Pablo.  I just asked he straight up if I could fuck her without a condom before dropping her off wherever the fuck she was going, which turned out to be a little north of ashby and a little east of San Pablo.  She said cool, so I had her suck me off, and then I fucked her and came inside her.  She gave me her number, and also told me to talk to her anytime I saw her on the street, and I would have done that; but the next time I tried to call her she was in jail.  Goddamned drug prohibition.  I want to get my nut on, gottdangit!

This is why, no matter what gun control laws are enacted, guns will always be around: Because Guns are a Motherfucking Thing that Exists

True story, way back in the day, when I worked security downtown Oaktown, this eejit figgered I had been peeping on his wife or gf, or whatever, I don't know, nor do I give a fuck.  I was actually fucking this other chick that lived there, and a few others that lived in the first floor would actually get naked and watch TV in front of their sliding glass doors as a come on. 
Anyways, this asshole pissed me off one too many times, and that's when I bought my first handgun, an 1851 confederate navy blackpowder revolver (this particular model was a favorite of Wyatt Earp, which is an absolute coincidence, because I have no respect for that cowardly asshole braggart).  After listening to him complain a few times about how I was peeping on his bitch, who lived on the second floor, BTW, and was a fucking cow anyways, he comes up to me drinking wine, spouts some shit, and breaks the glass he's drinking from against the wall.  At that point, I spring into the isoceles stance, go into my jacket, pop the strap, and get ready to bust out the steel.  I don't know, nor do I care if he actually thought I was trying to watch his bitch naked; but he never said shit to me after that, and that's why guns rock.