Friday, September 30, 2011
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
Kim Delaney Drunk?
Ok, Watch this vid:
Kim Dalaney's Speech at some political convention, maybe with some teleprompter probs, I don't know, because I couldn't see the teleprompter on the vid.
She is definitely drunk; but my question is, why does anybody care? She is just some actress that I'd never even heard of. I wouldn't respect her opinion even if she were stone cold sober. People respect my opinion even when I'm a little drunk, and specifically, because I would never get THAT drunk. I did it a couple of times when I was young; but sheesh, what is wrong with her at her age?
I mean, it's her right to get shitfaced; but if you're gonna be making a public appearance, I wouldn't recommend it; but mostly, who the fuck asks a starlet to speak at a political convention? That's just retarded.
IMHO, whoever asked her to do that must have been way more shitfaced when they offered her the gig, than she was when she delivered the speech.
Kim Dalaney's Speech at some political convention, maybe with some teleprompter probs, I don't know, because I couldn't see the teleprompter on the vid.
She is definitely drunk; but my question is, why does anybody care? She is just some actress that I'd never even heard of. I wouldn't respect her opinion even if she were stone cold sober. People respect my opinion even when I'm a little drunk, and specifically, because I would never get THAT drunk. I did it a couple of times when I was young; but sheesh, what is wrong with her at her age?
I mean, it's her right to get shitfaced; but if you're gonna be making a public appearance, I wouldn't recommend it; but mostly, who the fuck asks a starlet to speak at a political convention? That's just retarded.
IMHO, whoever asked her to do that must have been way more shitfaced when they offered her the gig, than she was when she delivered the speech.
Holy Fucking Shit. Nothing Good Can Come off This
First read this article. Not the whole thing, necessarily; but the last part, at least.
War and Terrorism, All Dressed up and Ready to Rock
Holy shit! I didn't believe it at first about the Boneyard; but I can clearly see a shitload of Tweety trainers, one F-16 viper, at least three B-1 bombers, an A-10 Warthog, an F-15 Eagle, an F-14 Tomcat, and a lot of other very outdated aircraft that should definintely be scrapped; but if the modern aircraft are no good anymore, scrap them. Don't keep them out in the middle of the dessert for no goddamned good reason. You realize how much damage a terrorist could do with a B-1? 9/11 would look like popping off a firecracker in comparison.
War and Terrorism, All Dressed up and Ready to Rock
Holy shit! I didn't believe it at first about the Boneyard; but I can clearly see a shitload of Tweety trainers, one F-16 viper, at least three B-1 bombers, an A-10 Warthog, an F-15 Eagle, an F-14 Tomcat, and a lot of other very outdated aircraft that should definintely be scrapped; but if the modern aircraft are no good anymore, scrap them. Don't keep them out in the middle of the dessert for no goddamned good reason. You realize how much damage a terrorist could do with a B-1? 9/11 would look like popping off a firecracker in comparison.
Sunday, September 25, 2011
Explosion!
I don't really understand how bread drenched in bacon fat can not ignite into a flash fire in the middle of a propane explosion; but it didn't, and I was able to finish toasting it, and to make my sandwich; but still, holy fuck.
Now I can genuinely call that mofo a pussy. I just got blowed up, and I didn't have any of that shit on me. Just a t-shirt and briefs.
Chile Peppers
I lived in Mexico for two years when I was a kid, and I hated chiles back then; but I remember this time we went for a breakfast meeting at my construction job,when I was in my twenties, and the waitress comes up to me and asks me if I wanted some Tabasco sauce. The fact that I'm Hispanic might have been her tipoff; but she didn't ask anybody else that. And it's not like I ordered huevos rancheros or anything like that. I ordered like pancakes and scrambled eggs, because they didn't even make huevos rancheros there. It's funny to me.
These days I won't eat a cheesesteak sandwich without Jalapeños, and I won't eat green mangoes, or what we call arrayán down here (I say down here, because the same name has been assigned to different fruits in different countries. What I'm referring to is like a guava; but smaller. If you cut it, its insides are whiter, and it tastes more sour than a guava). Without a healthy dose of ashuaiste (that's shucked and ground up pumpkin seeds,Which is a little weird; because I don't see any pumpkin patches anywhere around here. Even though it's almost Halloweeny time) and habañero sauce.
These days I won't eat a cheesesteak sandwich without Jalapeños, and I won't eat green mangoes, or what we call arrayán down here (I say down here, because the same name has been assigned to different fruits in different countries. What I'm referring to is like a guava; but smaller. If you cut it, its insides are whiter, and it tastes more sour than a guava). Without a healthy dose of ashuaiste (that's shucked and ground up pumpkin seeds,Which is a little weird; because I don't see any pumpkin patches anywhere around here. Even though it's almost Halloweeny time) and habañero sauce.
Saturday, September 24, 2011
Jehova's Witnesses
Josie did a very good job of tearing up their pants though. Wolfdogs rule!
And me coming out the door wearing nothing but briefs and a t-shirt was also probably pretty intimidating. Seriously, there are other ways to proselytize. The door to door method on Saturday mornings is the worst idea evar. My parting word to them was "fuckyou!"
What the fuck is wrong with these people? Seriousla. They will respect my authorita goddamnit! Either that, or they will end up buried in my front yard in a shallow grave with a metric buttload of lye on them, so they won't stink, and nobody hears from them again.
Little Update
Ok, so I've been fairly sick lately; and I'm working on some other projects; but I'm working on a wicked Kilka and Sophia story arc. I just won't be dedicating that much time to the blog probably, especially because I'm still working out the transformation of the trikes into battle armor. I really want to work that out before I publish the next episode; but I also have a novella I'm working on, and I'm also trying to build a Youtube channel. Although that's nothing like the content on here; but if it happens, you'll get the URL.
Friday, September 23, 2011
Knives and Swords
Ok. Seriously, if you like using knives or swords in fights, don't use double edged ones. Use either bowie style blades (that actually works with my machete quite well), or use a single edged katana. Preferably a handforged one. Also, preferably a straight one, like the Hawei Ninjatou.
Thursday, September 22, 2011
Swimming
Swimming or diving are some of the healthiest exercises you can do. I've never done it competitively; but I'm pretty good at it, and it WILL make you look hot.
I didn't get hot until college either. That's when people mistakenly thought I was a swimmer, although even in high school people knew better than to pick a fight with me. Nobody ever did that, because I had that vibe of "you give me a swirly, I'll fucking stab you." That worked out pretty good for me.
And I actually am a pretty strong swimmer and diver. Kinda runs in the fam, although I don't really practice that much. There is no pool near my house; but in college, I could outdive pretty much anyone at my co-op. Because in high school, I was actually pretty much forced to swim and dive everyday by my father and my stepmother whenever we lived in a place that had a pool, and in college, I actually was the pool maintenance guy at the co-op. My mother was also a swimmer.
My mother was actually a competitive swimmer, and she actually had a reputation for her swimming. I actually dove into the pool at my co-op for some trinket some girl had dropped there in the cold of winter. I brought it up from the deep end. I don't remember much about it, except that the water was fucking freezing, and I got it back from the icy depths where no one else dared dive.
Also, when you keep the pool clean, you can go skinny dipping with hot chicks. Fuckyeah!!!
I mean, when I first moved into that co-op that pool was disgusting. I had to look for the pool supplies and clean it religiously. Then we drained it, and some skateboarders demolished the plaster, so we had to fix it with epoxy and with epoxy paint. They did a little mural on it, and they were trying to do more; but eventually, I was like "It's fucking summer, let's just fill in the pool." Yeah, I'm the one that did that. It was like 4 am, and I never confessed back then; but yeah, I filled the goddamned pool, and if Rob Schwaggert has a prob with it, he can come and fight me. Fucking crankhead.
I didn't get hot until college either. That's when people mistakenly thought I was a swimmer, although even in high school people knew better than to pick a fight with me. Nobody ever did that, because I had that vibe of "you give me a swirly, I'll fucking stab you." That worked out pretty good for me.
And I actually am a pretty strong swimmer and diver. Kinda runs in the fam, although I don't really practice that much. There is no pool near my house; but in college, I could outdive pretty much anyone at my co-op. Because in high school, I was actually pretty much forced to swim and dive everyday by my father and my stepmother whenever we lived in a place that had a pool, and in college, I actually was the pool maintenance guy at the co-op. My mother was also a swimmer.
My mother was actually a competitive swimmer, and she actually had a reputation for her swimming. I actually dove into the pool at my co-op for some trinket some girl had dropped there in the cold of winter. I brought it up from the deep end. I don't remember much about it, except that the water was fucking freezing, and I got it back from the icy depths where no one else dared dive.
Also, when you keep the pool clean, you can go skinny dipping with hot chicks. Fuckyeah!!!
I mean, when I first moved into that co-op that pool was disgusting. I had to look for the pool supplies and clean it religiously. Then we drained it, and some skateboarders demolished the plaster, so we had to fix it with epoxy and with epoxy paint. They did a little mural on it, and they were trying to do more; but eventually, I was like "It's fucking summer, let's just fill in the pool." Yeah, I'm the one that did that. It was like 4 am, and I never confessed back then; but yeah, I filled the goddamned pool, and if Rob Schwaggert has a prob with it, he can come and fight me. Fucking crankhead.
Wednesday, September 21, 2011
Selena
So when I first met Selena, I didn't realize she was an opiate addict, I just knew she was a very sexy girl, and she gave me a very good blowjob with a condom. The second time I met her, I saw the track marks. I didn't have a condom, and she gave me one of the best blowjobs of my life. After I came in in her mouth, and she spit my cum, she told me to kiss her in the cheek, because she thought I wouldn't kiss her in the mouth after ejaculating in it, although I totally would have. I kept looking for her. Even got a few blowjobs from her frienemy. Finally after two years I found out the truth. Her opiate addiction caused her to get an infection on her leg. She went into a coma, and had to be intubated. I saw this black girl, and I tried to pick her up; but by the time I turned the three corners she was gone, and I saw this sexy girl sitting there. Then I recognized her. I called out "Selena!" She asked me how I knew her name. I told her my name, because I was in a different car from the one that she knew me by, and I had cut my hair shorter. She then explained me all about the addiction, and the coma, and how she had almost died. We then went to a place in the waterfront, and I fucked her without a condom, and I came inside of her.
I have ejaculated inside of many women's vaginas; but that was the most satisfying sexual experience of my life.
When you look for someone for many years, and you finally find them, and you pump your semen in them, that's like "what more can you possibly ask for?"
When post coitus a girl looks you in the eye, not just any girl; but the girl you have wanted to have sex with, for many years, and she laughs and says, "I can feel your warm cum sliding down my booty crack." That is so frigging hot.
I did it, and I've had sex with a lot of other girls since; but there is only one that could make me happier. Elizabeth.
I have ejaculated inside of many women's vaginas; but that was the most satisfying sexual experience of my life.
When you look for someone for many years, and you finally find them, and you pump your semen in them, that's like "what more can you possibly ask for?"
When post coitus a girl looks you in the eye, not just any girl; but the girl you have wanted to have sex with, for many years, and she laughs and says, "I can feel your warm cum sliding down my booty crack." That is so frigging hot.
I did it, and I've had sex with a lot of other girls since; but there is only one that could make me happier. Elizabeth.
Boobs
Boobs are the nourishment of children. They are the bringers of courage in men. Nothing in the world would get done if it were not for boobs. And if you are a woman, and you have big titties, and you are showing them off, don't blame any man within your vecinity for looking at them. That's kind of the point, isn't it?
Greetings to Mother Russia
I have noticed that you have been reading some of my articles lately, I thank you for your readership. You are too kind to take an interest in my writing. I hope you will continue to read my writing.
Tuesday, September 20, 2011
Death
When the whirly blades come out, especially if I'm naked, you are so fucked. People do not fight other people naked unless they mean bidness. If I'm naked I'm either gonna fight you or fuck you, or do both. Either way, when my blades come out, you better run away as fast as you can, and as far as you can. My blades be deadly, mothefucka.
Aversion
Here's what fucking happens. Sometimes, some women develop an aversion to men. Most of the time it's not logical. It's not because of anything the man has done, It's because she has been molested, or in her own mind she imagines shit about that man, that is not true. I neither need nor want such worhless women. Worthless women, please do not waste your time, or mine.
I know that my last post was what might be considered sexist; but a couple of women have been competing for my afections, and they both have been doing it in the most annoying way. If you want a man, go over to his damned house and fucking talk to him, and then have sex with him, or at least give him a blow job. It's not fucking rocket science; but if you keep hesitating about whether or not you want to come date me, you can go fuck yourself. It's extremely annoying dealing with women that expect you to house them; but are total flakes. Extremely. Nobody needs pussy that bad.
I know that my last post was what might be considered sexist; but a couple of women have been competing for my afections, and they both have been doing it in the most annoying way. If you want a man, go over to his damned house and fucking talk to him, and then have sex with him, or at least give him a blow job. It's not fucking rocket science; but if you keep hesitating about whether or not you want to come date me, you can go fuck yourself. It's extremely annoying dealing with women that expect you to house them; but are total flakes. Extremely. Nobody needs pussy that bad.
Monday, September 19, 2011
Breaking Up Is Not so Hard to Do Part 3
This is how you handle a woman, even one you haven't that much of a bond with. You bitchslap her, you send her back into the kitchen barefoot, and she better come back with a samich. Otherwise, you punch her in the face, because she FUCKING DESERVES IT! Do not fuck with me bitches. I am the king. You are dross off the swamp.
Prostitution
Ok, so here in El Salvador, prostitution is pretty much legal. Pimping is not. What I would like to see is the brothels regulated, just to make sure there aren't any underage girls in them. Brothels ARE illegal; but nobody enforces that, and it concerns me, because some types of prohibition have unintended consequences. We will never get rid of prostitution, and whatever a man and a woman do behind closed doors, and why they do it, or how much money they exchange or anything like that is their own goddamned bidness. I have actually had men pay me to fuck their wives. I guess that makes me a whore too; but you wouldn't even know it if I hadn't told you that, so how does that hurt you, why do you care? Are you one of those people that lies awake at night worried that somebody, somewhere might be having fun? If you are that type of person, you are contributing to human trafficking. Also, you are a self-righteous asshole, and I'd nunchaku you so much if you were in front of me.
Saturday, September 17, 2011
Islamists
Ok, Islamism is the definition of hypocrisy. This is how islamists publish porn. They show you the picture, and then they write some bullshit about how these western infidel women are whores. Here's a link to a perfect example of that:
Jihad? More like jizz had
And believe me, for every one of those censored pictures, the assholes have an uncensored photoshop elsewhere in the site. They jack off to the photoshops then call the women whores. Fucking sexually repressed assholes.
All Islamists are fucking cowards. They are hoping for 72 virgins in Allah's heaven. What are they retarded? I've had sex with a metric buttload of women here, and yet I've never met a virgin, What, does Allah the merciful piece of shit that is asking you to blow yourself up in exchange for some pussy have a virgin factory in heaven? No! Of course he doesn't; but if you want a fight, you challenge, and I set the terms. I fucking hate Islamists. I fucking hate them more than I have ever hated anything.
Jihad? More like jizz had
And believe me, for every one of those censored pictures, the assholes have an uncensored photoshop elsewhere in the site. They jack off to the photoshops then call the women whores. Fucking sexually repressed assholes.
All Islamists are fucking cowards. They are hoping for 72 virgins in Allah's heaven. What are they retarded? I've had sex with a metric buttload of women here, and yet I've never met a virgin, What, does Allah the merciful piece of shit that is asking you to blow yourself up in exchange for some pussy have a virgin factory in heaven? No! Of course he doesn't; but if you want a fight, you challenge, and I set the terms. I fucking hate Islamists. I fucking hate them more than I have ever hated anything.
Friday, September 16, 2011
Breaking Up Is Not so Hard to Do Part 2
Ok, so at some point you realize that that woman has another man, or she is out of love with you; but for whatever reason, even though it would be the easiest thing for her to do, and she used to come see you at least once a week when you first started dating, now it's once a month, and then, you spend three monts without seeing hide or hair of her. That's when you realize that woman isn't worth her weight in shit. Still. You give her a second chance She keeps coming over once a month, then two months pass by, and she doesn't come over. That's when you tell her to go fuck herself. I don't have time to waste on trash like that.
I hope she is happy; but she won't have my house, and I bet anyone anything that is actually worth something, that I can find another woman way faster than she can find another man that is worth dating. She is older than I. As a man gets older he gets richer, and wiser. As a woman gets older, she gets weaker, and uglier.
She still calls me. In fact, she called me earlier today. Maybe she wanted to come to my house. I didn't even answer. I am not that desperate for pussy, and I never will be.
To any man that is worth a fuck, bitches are a dime a dozen. I could get laid at least thrice tonight with different women, if I wanted to, except I already have a new live-in girlfriend moving in next week, because I'm badass like that. Put that in your pipe and smoke it, ladies. Too few women understand that the truly desirable men have options, until they lose them to another woman, and then there's all the crying and all the bullshit, well you know what? Save it. You brought it on yourself.
Now a full day has gone by. I called her last night. Told her not to call me anymore because of the new live-in girlfriend. She sent me a text with her email address today. She doesn't even own a fucking computer or pay for internet access. What is she? Fucking stupid?
I hope she is happy; but she won't have my house, and I bet anyone anything that is actually worth something, that I can find another woman way faster than she can find another man that is worth dating. She is older than I. As a man gets older he gets richer, and wiser. As a woman gets older, she gets weaker, and uglier.
She still calls me. In fact, she called me earlier today. Maybe she wanted to come to my house. I didn't even answer. I am not that desperate for pussy, and I never will be.
To any man that is worth a fuck, bitches are a dime a dozen. I could get laid at least thrice tonight with different women, if I wanted to, except I already have a new live-in girlfriend moving in next week, because I'm badass like that. Put that in your pipe and smoke it, ladies. Too few women understand that the truly desirable men have options, until they lose them to another woman, and then there's all the crying and all the bullshit, well you know what? Save it. You brought it on yourself.
Now a full day has gone by. I called her last night. Told her not to call me anymore because of the new live-in girlfriend. She sent me a text with her email address today. She doesn't even own a fucking computer or pay for internet access. What is she? Fucking stupid?
Cosmo For Guys
Ok, is this really a magazine we need? We've had Stuff magazine and Maxim, and that other one that is a collection of letters with some incomprehensible meaning, HQM? I can't fucking remember it for the life of me. Those are basically the same fucking magazine, and if you read any of those, it means you're gay, so just come to terms with that and come out to your family.
Used to be the men's magazines were Popular Mechanics, Playboy, and Hustler. Now we have this dross polluting the world. If you aren't teaching me how to build stuff, or showing me T&A, don't bother, and girls in bikinis don't count. I want to see them buttnaked.
Also, this scourge of the earth is why when many modern so-called men pop a flat they take out their cell phone and call a tow truck, instead of taking out the tire iron, the jack, and the spare, and changing the goddamned tire. If you look up "disgrace" in the dictionary, you'll find a picture of a guy with a flat on his car calling a tow truck on his cell phone next to the definition.
What got me into this rant is this experiment by CFG:
What do girls look at when meeting a guy?
And I think they got it all wrong, because I think girls look at your face the most, and although this might be counterintuitive, they look at your legs second, then your butt. My last girlfriend told me she would love to have my butt and legs, and another girl who wasn't really my girlfriend (although she gave me a topless lapdance once, and she was a very good friend, and she obviously had feelings for me, and I was totally in love with her) once told me that she wished she had the legs of her crossdressing male friend (even though she actually had prettier legs than him). She actually as a joke, actually asked me once, if I wanted to meet a friend of hers, then she showed me pictures of her; but as soon as I saw the legs I realized it was a man, and I told her "that's a dude." She then admitted she was playing a joke on me and it was her crossdressing friend that I had met before; but dressed as a man. With all the makeup on, I didn't recognize him as the same person; but I did recognize that it was a man in drag. I mean I lived in the SF Bay Area long enough to be able to spot a tranny or a TV from a mile away.
Finally, here's some advice for trannies and TV's: Don't try to fool people, that's why so many of you end up beat up or killed. There are way too many people that want trannies and TV's to risk it. Just be honest with people. I once punched a TV for trying to fool me, and then not taking "no" for an answer when I realized he was a man (the place was dark; but once I heard his voice I knew it was a man, and I was like get off me, and he was like, "no, I want you to fuck me." And I was like "get the fuck off me or I'm gonna punch you," and he was like "no," so I punched him, and he stopped bothering me).
Used to be the men's magazines were Popular Mechanics, Playboy, and Hustler. Now we have this dross polluting the world. If you aren't teaching me how to build stuff, or showing me T&A, don't bother, and girls in bikinis don't count. I want to see them buttnaked.
Also, this scourge of the earth is why when many modern so-called men pop a flat they take out their cell phone and call a tow truck, instead of taking out the tire iron, the jack, and the spare, and changing the goddamned tire. If you look up "disgrace" in the dictionary, you'll find a picture of a guy with a flat on his car calling a tow truck on his cell phone next to the definition.
What got me into this rant is this experiment by CFG:
What do girls look at when meeting a guy?
And I think they got it all wrong, because I think girls look at your face the most, and although this might be counterintuitive, they look at your legs second, then your butt. My last girlfriend told me she would love to have my butt and legs, and another girl who wasn't really my girlfriend (although she gave me a topless lapdance once, and she was a very good friend, and she obviously had feelings for me, and I was totally in love with her) once told me that she wished she had the legs of her crossdressing male friend (even though she actually had prettier legs than him). She actually as a joke, actually asked me once, if I wanted to meet a friend of hers, then she showed me pictures of her; but as soon as I saw the legs I realized it was a man, and I told her "that's a dude." She then admitted she was playing a joke on me and it was her crossdressing friend that I had met before; but dressed as a man. With all the makeup on, I didn't recognize him as the same person; but I did recognize that it was a man in drag. I mean I lived in the SF Bay Area long enough to be able to spot a tranny or a TV from a mile away.
Finally, here's some advice for trannies and TV's: Don't try to fool people, that's why so many of you end up beat up or killed. There are way too many people that want trannies and TV's to risk it. Just be honest with people. I once punched a TV for trying to fool me, and then not taking "no" for an answer when I realized he was a man (the place was dark; but once I heard his voice I knew it was a man, and I was like get off me, and he was like, "no, I want you to fuck me." And I was like "get the fuck off me or I'm gonna punch you," and he was like "no," so I punched him, and he stopped bothering me).
Thursday, September 15, 2011
Sunday, September 11, 2011
Racial Relations
Actually, America, as racist as it is, is better than most other countries at not being racist. I lived in the US for almost 20 years, and I had friends and lovers of most ethnicities. Here in Central America, I don't see many people other than mestizo, and Americans that are here on business or vacation, also, a few German tourists. If you are particularly dark skinned, your nickname is nigga. If you happen to be Chinese (I guess some Chinese emigrated here after the revolution), people just call you chino.
Black people were actually legally banned from even travelling here for a long time. I'm not sure if they actually are anymore. I hope they're not; but I haven't seen any since I came here, and that pains me, because that just shouldn't be that way.
And when I say for a long time, I mean since like the 1920's or the 1930's, until I don't know when. I love black people; I've had many black friends and lovers; but I'm not sure if the ban has been removed, although I certainly hope it has. You don't choose to be born, and you certainly don't choose your ethnicity, and you most definitely cannot change it.
You cannot change your ethnicity, period, and neither can anyone else. So you'd better learn to get along, and to enjoy the rich experiences that these other cultures offer you, and believe me, you will enjoy them. I have been craving Shawarma for over a year and I only know of one place that offers it here, and it's very far away, so I haven't gone; but I sure as hell loved eating shawarma in the US.
You want pupusas? They got them in the US; but if you want a proper tamale, you gotta come down here.
Likewise, If I want to properly celebrate Thanksgiving, with all the fixings, I'd really have to do it in the US. Thanksgiving down here isn't even a holiday, and you can't get all the shit you need to properly celebrate it. The most you can get is a turkey, or a large chicken. That pisses me off, because after 20 years, you get used to some things, and now I can't have them. I can't possibly find the cranberry sauce down here, or pumpking pie, goddamnit! And if I want stuffing, I have to fucking make it from scratch.
Even for Xmas people hardly ever make the turkey right.
Black people were actually legally banned from even travelling here for a long time. I'm not sure if they actually are anymore. I hope they're not; but I haven't seen any since I came here, and that pains me, because that just shouldn't be that way.
And when I say for a long time, I mean since like the 1920's or the 1930's, until I don't know when. I love black people; I've had many black friends and lovers; but I'm not sure if the ban has been removed, although I certainly hope it has. You don't choose to be born, and you certainly don't choose your ethnicity, and you most definitely cannot change it.
You cannot change your ethnicity, period, and neither can anyone else. So you'd better learn to get along, and to enjoy the rich experiences that these other cultures offer you, and believe me, you will enjoy them. I have been craving Shawarma for over a year and I only know of one place that offers it here, and it's very far away, so I haven't gone; but I sure as hell loved eating shawarma in the US.
You want pupusas? They got them in the US; but if you want a proper tamale, you gotta come down here.
Likewise, If I want to properly celebrate Thanksgiving, with all the fixings, I'd really have to do it in the US. Thanksgiving down here isn't even a holiday, and you can't get all the shit you need to properly celebrate it. The most you can get is a turkey, or a large chicken. That pisses me off, because after 20 years, you get used to some things, and now I can't have them. I can't possibly find the cranberry sauce down here, or pumpking pie, goddamnit! And if I want stuffing, I have to fucking make it from scratch.
Even for Xmas people hardly ever make the turkey right.
More Photo Commentary.
So this is the pic collection this time:
Picdump Fails
1. That's not the Italian flag. Ever hear of a little country called Israel?
2. Well, to begin with, there are only 7 days in a week, and if you're closed one of them, that does not equal 8. Math. You're doing it wrong.
3. I'm guessing whoever filled that machine was giving the company the finger, because that's just not how vending machines work; but maybe that machine can be filled like that and still work, although next time someone tries to fill it, they are going to be pissed.
4. That's just fucked up.
5. Just use the goddamned stairs, you lazy fuck. Reminds me of the time I was in an escalator, and it broke, and it took like ten seconds for all the assholes in front of me to realize that a stopped escalator works just like fucking stairs.
6. Seriously? That's a fucking brand name? Because I would not use any product that uses that name.
7. That's not how you aim a camera, dumbass.
8. Yes; but not in elemental form, go back to school and learn some science, fucktard.
9. I agree that hipsters are dangerous, so that's not a fail.
10. That kid is going to grow up to kill you.
11. That kid is going to grow up to kill both of you.
12. Self-explanatory.
13. If it's not for sale, why bother including the number?
14. I guess it was just for the photoshoot; but that's not how piercings work.
15. I'm guessing the guy who welded that together was also trying to give whoever hired him a fuck you, because that is clearly a cock at bottom left.
16. And another cock.
17. Lamb IS meat, fucktard.
I'm going to include another article as a bonus, with pictures of underboob, because you know I love boobs, and I prefer underboob to cleavage. Here ya go: Enjoy.
Underboob
Picdump Fails
1. That's not the Italian flag. Ever hear of a little country called Israel?
2. Well, to begin with, there are only 7 days in a week, and if you're closed one of them, that does not equal 8. Math. You're doing it wrong.
3. I'm guessing whoever filled that machine was giving the company the finger, because that's just not how vending machines work; but maybe that machine can be filled like that and still work, although next time someone tries to fill it, they are going to be pissed.
4. That's just fucked up.
5. Just use the goddamned stairs, you lazy fuck. Reminds me of the time I was in an escalator, and it broke, and it took like ten seconds for all the assholes in front of me to realize that a stopped escalator works just like fucking stairs.
6. Seriously? That's a fucking brand name? Because I would not use any product that uses that name.
7. That's not how you aim a camera, dumbass.
8. Yes; but not in elemental form, go back to school and learn some science, fucktard.
9. I agree that hipsters are dangerous, so that's not a fail.
10. That kid is going to grow up to kill you.
11. That kid is going to grow up to kill both of you.
12. Self-explanatory.
13. If it's not for sale, why bother including the number?
14. I guess it was just for the photoshoot; but that's not how piercings work.
15. I'm guessing the guy who welded that together was also trying to give whoever hired him a fuck you, because that is clearly a cock at bottom left.
16. And another cock.
17. Lamb IS meat, fucktard.
I'm going to include another article as a bonus, with pictures of underboob, because you know I love boobs, and I prefer underboob to cleavage. Here ya go: Enjoy.
Underboob
Friday, September 9, 2011
My Mom's Titties
Wow, not sure how to feel about this; but the fact that I sucked my mom's tits, and that I sucked her nipples and motorboated them (I cannot emphasize enough that when I was ten years old, and she was 45, my mom had huge tits, and I loved playing with them, and I'm pretty sure she loved that too) sure seems to interest you guys a lot.
It actually only took me like 5 minutes to convince her to let me suck her nipples and play with those huge breasts the first time, and she could have totally said no; but she didn't. As I said, I wasn't even aware of how sex worked back then; but my first sexual experience was playing with my moms titties. It wasn't like a regular thing we did, either; but she did let me play with her boobs a few times, all while I was ten.
Eight years later I had sex with Valerie. That was the first time I put my penis in a woman. She wasn't really even worth the time. I won't write about that; because that sucked; but my mom's breasts were hot. I really miss my mom's tits when she was 45 and she let me motorboat her and suck her nipples and play with those huge breasts, and I'm not quite sure why she let me do that; because I was breastfed as a baby; but it's one thing to breastfeed your baby, and it's quite another to let your ten year old play with your boobs when you're not even milking. But we did do that. I'm not quite sure why I asked her, and then insisted, and as I said, I think she mostly agreed because after she divorced my dad she never dated again, and she wanted some sex, and me asking to play with her boobs was an easy way to get sexual stimuli.
I also can't believe I'm actually writing that my first sexual experience was with my mom, except it totally was, and I'd be a hypocrite to say otherwise.
Here's a little photo montage of my mom around the time she let me suck on her boobs. You can tell just from the pictures that she was hot; but what you can't see in the pics is just how big her boobs were, also, she was a competitive swimmmer in high school, so her body was pretty hot overall. Don't ask me why the pictures are all in black and white. I know that by the time they were taken there was definitely color photography, so I think it was like an artistic decision by either my mom or the photographer. I think it was probably my mom's decision, because those are definitely different photo shoots, and they are all in black and white.
I will not fucking apologize for playing with my mom's titties. I enjoyed that immensely.
That's human sexuality for you. Sometimes a 45 year old woman will have what might be considered an improper sexual relationship with her 10 year old son, and I'm not saying that my mom was a child molester or anything like that. I was the one that asked her to let me play with her boobs. And as I mentioned before, I'm not quite sure why; but I did ask her, and once she refused, I kept asking until she took off her blouse, and she let me go at those beautiful, beatiful tits. I mean seriously, my mom had huge tits, and even at 45 she had a hot body. I hope I look as hot as she did back then in 9 years. In fact I hope I look that hot forever, because my mom was very hot at 45, and if I even knew how to give a woman oral sex when I was ten, I totally would have done her the favor.
In fact, I'm only sorry I didn't eat her out back then, because the reason that woman didn't date anyone after she divorced my dad was in large part because of me. But back then I really just didn't understand how penises or vaginas worked.
The extent of my sexual knowledge was that I wanted to play with my mom's boobs, and she let me.
In fact, if my mom were still alive, I would eat her out, and I would probably fuck her too.
That woman deserved way more sexual satisfaction than she ever got in life, and she did that because of me.
I actually have this recurring dream where I fuck my mom. Don't ask me why. I just have that dream.
Dreams are not predictors of the future, unlike some people will tell you. Dreams are just like something that is swimming around your head, and you ignore it when you're awake; but once you go to sleep, it creeps up, and so I have fucked my mom in my dreams, several times. I don't choose to have that dream. In fact, I hate having any dreams at all; but every once in a while, I dream that I'm fucking my mom, and I've had that recurring dream many times.
I fucking hate dreams, because it usually means my potassium level has gone to shit; but if I could fuck my mom when she was 45, I would totally do that. I would give that woman the best sex of her life, because she deserved it. Everyone deserves to have some badass sex. The problem is that I really didn't know anything about sex back then. I just wanted to play with her huge titties. Don't ask me why I wanted to do that, or why she let me; but it did happen. And it was fucking awesome.
I loved my mom's huge titties. Period.
It actually only took me like 5 minutes to convince her to let me suck her nipples and play with those huge breasts the first time, and she could have totally said no; but she didn't. As I said, I wasn't even aware of how sex worked back then; but my first sexual experience was playing with my moms titties. It wasn't like a regular thing we did, either; but she did let me play with her boobs a few times, all while I was ten.
Eight years later I had sex with Valerie. That was the first time I put my penis in a woman. She wasn't really even worth the time. I won't write about that; because that sucked; but my mom's breasts were hot. I really miss my mom's tits when she was 45 and she let me motorboat her and suck her nipples and play with those huge breasts, and I'm not quite sure why she let me do that; because I was breastfed as a baby; but it's one thing to breastfeed your baby, and it's quite another to let your ten year old play with your boobs when you're not even milking. But we did do that. I'm not quite sure why I asked her, and then insisted, and as I said, I think she mostly agreed because after she divorced my dad she never dated again, and she wanted some sex, and me asking to play with her boobs was an easy way to get sexual stimuli.
I also can't believe I'm actually writing that my first sexual experience was with my mom, except it totally was, and I'd be a hypocrite to say otherwise.
Here's a little photo montage of my mom around the time she let me suck on her boobs. You can tell just from the pictures that she was hot; but what you can't see in the pics is just how big her boobs were, also, she was a competitive swimmmer in high school, so her body was pretty hot overall. Don't ask me why the pictures are all in black and white. I know that by the time they were taken there was definitely color photography, so I think it was like an artistic decision by either my mom or the photographer. I think it was probably my mom's decision, because those are definitely different photo shoots, and they are all in black and white.
That's human sexuality for you. Sometimes a 45 year old woman will have what might be considered an improper sexual relationship with her 10 year old son, and I'm not saying that my mom was a child molester or anything like that. I was the one that asked her to let me play with her boobs. And as I mentioned before, I'm not quite sure why; but I did ask her, and once she refused, I kept asking until she took off her blouse, and she let me go at those beautiful, beatiful tits. I mean seriously, my mom had huge tits, and even at 45 she had a hot body. I hope I look as hot as she did back then in 9 years. In fact I hope I look that hot forever, because my mom was very hot at 45, and if I even knew how to give a woman oral sex when I was ten, I totally would have done her the favor.
In fact, I'm only sorry I didn't eat her out back then, because the reason that woman didn't date anyone after she divorced my dad was in large part because of me. But back then I really just didn't understand how penises or vaginas worked.
The extent of my sexual knowledge was that I wanted to play with my mom's boobs, and she let me.
In fact, if my mom were still alive, I would eat her out, and I would probably fuck her too.
That woman deserved way more sexual satisfaction than she ever got in life, and she did that because of me.
I actually have this recurring dream where I fuck my mom. Don't ask me why. I just have that dream.
Dreams are not predictors of the future, unlike some people will tell you. Dreams are just like something that is swimming around your head, and you ignore it when you're awake; but once you go to sleep, it creeps up, and so I have fucked my mom in my dreams, several times. I don't choose to have that dream. In fact, I hate having any dreams at all; but every once in a while, I dream that I'm fucking my mom, and I've had that recurring dream many times.
I fucking hate dreams, because it usually means my potassium level has gone to shit; but if I could fuck my mom when she was 45, I would totally do that. I would give that woman the best sex of her life, because she deserved it. Everyone deserves to have some badass sex. The problem is that I really didn't know anything about sex back then. I just wanted to play with her huge titties. Don't ask me why I wanted to do that, or why she let me; but it did happen. And it was fucking awesome.
I loved my mom's huge titties. Period.
Theresa
Ok, so I mentioned how my mom's boobs were the first I ever played with and sucked on. The biggest I ever I sucked on and played with were Theresa's.
Theresa was this black girl. She was a little overweight; But she had huge tits. Those are seriously the hugest tits I've ever seen. Ever. I'm not quite sure they even make bras in that size, because both of her breasts weighed like five pounds each. Seriously, I couldn't believe that breasts could be that huge if I hadn't actually seen it.
And I did cum in her mouth, and in her pussy, while playing with her tits.
Theresa was this black girl. She was a little overweight; But she had huge tits. Those are seriously the hugest tits I've ever seen. Ever. I'm not quite sure they even make bras in that size, because both of her breasts weighed like five pounds each. Seriously, I couldn't believe that breasts could be that huge if I hadn't actually seen it.
And I did cum in her mouth, and in her pussy, while playing with her tits.
The Word Cuca
Ok, that word has a double meaning. It can mean a Cockroach, or a girls pussy. I first learned that word because there are a lot of cockroaches here in El Salvador (it's the goddamn tropics, so sometimes, we even have roaches that fly, and those roaches are huge. You think stomping on a roach is hard? Try killing one that flies); but my mom also referred to her vagina as her cuca.
This is in referrence to this vid:
My cuca is out
I never saw it; but that's how my mom always referred to her vagina. Funny to know that's how they refer to vaginas in Italy.
I also saw her topless multiple times, and I sucked her breasts when I was way too old to do it. I'm not sure why my mom let me suck on her breasts when I was ten years old, except that she wasn't dating anyone, and she probably wanted some sexual stimulation.
And I did love sucking her boobies, because my mom had pretty huge breasts.
She was the adult, and I was the kid, so she was the one that should have set boundaries. I was only ten, so I really had no comprehension of sexuality; but I did enjoy playing with my moms boobs.
I did have something of an Oedipus complex with her, and those were great boobs to play with. Goddamnit I loved her boobs. I loved the hell out of them.
Then, in 2003, she turned on me. I was working 70 motherfucking hours a week. I stopped talking to her because she thought my lack of sleep was a sign of drug addiction, and I just hung up on her whenever she called me. In 2005 my mom got very sick as a result of her being an agricultural engineer and working with herbicides without ever wearing a respirator. From being bedridden, she got a pulmonary embolism. She died the same year my daughter was born. I miss her, and I miss sucking on her boobs.
Goddamnit my mom was sexy, and her boobs were huge, and I loved her tits. There are many girls I've fucked; but there is only one that had bigger tits than my mom, and there is only one other one that could compete with my mom's tits, and she'd probably lose the tit contest.
I didn't really understand sex when I was 10; but yeah, my first true sexual experience was playing with my mom's boobs. And I enjoyed that.
Also, I will not make excuses about playing with my mom's boobs. And if you demand that out of me, come over here and make me excuse the fact that I loved my mom's boobs, because she had epic boobs. Seriously, my my mom had huge tits, and I loved playing with those breasts, and she also enjoyed when I played with them. She had boob for days, and she loved when I sucked on those bigass titties. And I loved to suck on them.
This is in referrence to this vid:
My cuca is out
I never saw it; but that's how my mom always referred to her vagina. Funny to know that's how they refer to vaginas in Italy.
I also saw her topless multiple times, and I sucked her breasts when I was way too old to do it. I'm not sure why my mom let me suck on her breasts when I was ten years old, except that she wasn't dating anyone, and she probably wanted some sexual stimulation.
And I did love sucking her boobies, because my mom had pretty huge breasts.
She was the adult, and I was the kid, so she was the one that should have set boundaries. I was only ten, so I really had no comprehension of sexuality; but I did enjoy playing with my moms boobs.
I did have something of an Oedipus complex with her, and those were great boobs to play with. Goddamnit I loved her boobs. I loved the hell out of them.
Then, in 2003, she turned on me. I was working 70 motherfucking hours a week. I stopped talking to her because she thought my lack of sleep was a sign of drug addiction, and I just hung up on her whenever she called me. In 2005 my mom got very sick as a result of her being an agricultural engineer and working with herbicides without ever wearing a respirator. From being bedridden, she got a pulmonary embolism. She died the same year my daughter was born. I miss her, and I miss sucking on her boobs.
Goddamnit my mom was sexy, and her boobs were huge, and I loved her tits. There are many girls I've fucked; but there is only one that had bigger tits than my mom, and there is only one other one that could compete with my mom's tits, and she'd probably lose the tit contest.
I didn't really understand sex when I was 10; but yeah, my first true sexual experience was playing with my mom's boobs. And I enjoyed that.
Also, I will not make excuses about playing with my mom's boobs. And if you demand that out of me, come over here and make me excuse the fact that I loved my mom's boobs, because she had epic boobs. Seriously, my my mom had huge tits, and I loved playing with those breasts, and she also enjoyed when I played with them. She had boob for days, and she loved when I sucked on those bigass titties. And I loved to suck on them.
Thursday, September 8, 2011
Coming Out of the Closet Part 3
Ok, maybe I like to suck dicks, and swallow cum. Or maybe I like to fuck girls and come inside them. If you have a problem with what I do behind closed doors with other people, you know what you get? You get stabbed in the chest.
As I've mentioned before, I have too many lesbian and bisexual friends to stand for some arbitrary religious bigotry. If your god hates my friend then I hate your god, and your god does not exist; but I do exist, and heads will roll if anyone fucks with my friends.
Katanas and machetes trump some fairy tale about some god.
Who's your god? The guy standing in front of you with a katana and a machete is your god. And if you are on that religious bigotry kick, I will chop your head off. Period.
As I've mentioned before, I have too many lesbian and bisexual friends to stand for some arbitrary religious bigotry. If your god hates my friend then I hate your god, and your god does not exist; but I do exist, and heads will roll if anyone fucks with my friends.
Katanas and machetes trump some fairy tale about some god.
Who's your god? The guy standing in front of you with a katana and a machete is your god. And if you are on that religious bigotry kick, I will chop your head off. Period.
Manners
So I went to the store today. I just needed to get like $15 out of the ATM and buy some booze, some Gatorade, an artichoke, a flashlight and a a pair of leather gloves. The army was there, they even went into the hardware store that I went into, and they didn't dis me; but these asshole teenagers almost got stabbed to death for talking shit prior to that. Do not ever insult a person unless you are ready for the consequences; because you don't know what the consequences might be. Also, last night, I almost uppercutted this motorcyclist. You know what's worse than getting run over by a motorcycle? Running into a fist at 30 kmh, plus the velocity of the fist. Even if you're wearing a helmet, if you do that, you will die, so don't do that shit.
Kilka and Sophia Episode Sex (6)
I kind of wondered if I should write it this way; but this is the way I'm gonna write it; because I decided Kilka is bisexual, and now you will see it.
So Kilka calls up his cousin in-law and he asks him "can you get a platoon to my factory soon? I will train them in the use of the military trikes, and then we can go to the presidential palace and take that place." Two hours later Kilka is training a platoon on the use of the military transforming trikes. He leaves the liger behind, and takes one of his military trikes, with Sophia and the platoon in tow.
They get to the area of the Presidential Mansion, and start shooting the cops. It's not even that much of a challenge; because once the military trikes transform, they have a lot of armor, plus two guns on the front, and an anti-tank rifle, and a a TOW missile, which is usually not necessary. Then, at the gates of the presidential Mansion, Kilka throws a grenade to open the gates, he then tells Sophia to follow him. The platoon stays back.
Kilka yells "Leeroy Jenkins!" and he crashes through the door, with Sophia in tow.
His cousin says "Well he just ran in there, didn't he? don't follow him, just set up a perimeter, and that is a historical door that he just broke, goddamnit, bull in a china shop."
Once Kilka and Sophes are inside, all these cops and the VP come out, the VP is wielding an RPG, and Kilka tells him "if you use that indoors, the whole building will fall on top of us."
Still, the VP shoots, and Kilka is like "huh, that was a very weak explosion. Oh shit; I can't move. That wasn't an RPG, it was an EMP. Can you move Sophie? My trike is completely immobilized."
Sophie answers "yes master, thanks to you building a faraday cage into me, I am not dead; but I cannot move either, also, all my communication functions are dead..."
The VP instructs the cops to cut Kilka out of his armor trike with the jaws of life, then strip him naked. Then to put him in this room. Then he tells him, "I'm gonna fuck you."
Kilka responds "I didn't know you liked to fuck men; but I like to suck dick, and to get fucked in the ass, so that's cool with me."
The VP then tells the cops to leave him alone with Kilka. They stand outside the door. They hear noises, and they ask the VP if everything is allright. The VP tells them to go defend the damn place because by this time there is a lot of shooting outside.
A few minutes later, Kilka comes out of the room naked, wearing only the VP's shoulder holster and his pistol. He finds his armor, and he gets dressed in it. He mutters, "well, the sex was fun; but you should not try to usurp the will of a people." Yet the VP cannot hear this. He is crumpled on the floor with his neck broken.
Kilka then starts clearing rooms. Because of all the shooting, nobody notices. Soon enough, he gets a Galil. After that, he finds a computer and he logs on to the video phone, then he drags the VP's body over to it, and he calls his contacts in the media. Once the dead body of the VP is seen online , the cops realize their fight is lost, and they retreat.
Then Kilka has Sophia towed to his house, so he can get her out of the battle armor.
After that, the President calls up Kilka, and he tells him "I thank you for all you have done for me; but there are a lot of people calling for your head."
Kilka answers to the president: "If you set the hounds on me, I will take a long vacation. then let's see what happens to you. Those cops will come back to kill you."
The prez then replied: "They found your DNA on his genitals, maybe we can work that angle."
Kilka replies: "Fuck you, I loved sucking his dick almost as much as I loved breaking his neck. Almost; but not quite; because breaking that asshole's neck was way more enjoyable than swallowing his cum. Although I did swallow his cum, and I enjoyed it."
As a consequence of that conversation between Kilka and his prez, Kilka received the highest medal that a civilian can receive in his country. There was also an amnesty for all parties involved in the fighting. That does not sit well with Kilka; but he can't really do much about it, or can he?
Fuckyeah, he can!
Did I take it too far with the violence and the sex? I'd like to know. Please comment. I know that the idea of a guy giving another dude a blowjob, and then breaking his neck is pretty extreme; but that's how I conceived it from the first. As I said, Kilka is bisexual. And extremely promiscuous. He has sex with a lot of men and women. And you can see my previous posts to find out why I conceived the character that way.
And just wait until you hear about Kilka's daughter, Spectra. Because she's all out fucks and all out of bubblegum, and she doesn't even like bubblegum. Bubblegum sucks.
Spectra is also extremely promiscuous, and she loves to suck dick, and to kick ass, because the apple never falls far from the tree. Kilka does not judge her for sucking a lot of dicks, or for fucking a lot of men. That would be pretty hyppocritical.
Sorry I haven't yet finished the mechanical design for the trikes. Rome wasn't built in a day, as they say. I've been going at it though; but it's really hard to do mechanical transforming design. especially when you consider that there is an operator inside the robot.
So Kilka calls up his cousin in-law and he asks him "can you get a platoon to my factory soon? I will train them in the use of the military trikes, and then we can go to the presidential palace and take that place." Two hours later Kilka is training a platoon on the use of the military transforming trikes. He leaves the liger behind, and takes one of his military trikes, with Sophia and the platoon in tow.
They get to the area of the Presidential Mansion, and start shooting the cops. It's not even that much of a challenge; because once the military trikes transform, they have a lot of armor, plus two guns on the front, and an anti-tank rifle, and a a TOW missile, which is usually not necessary. Then, at the gates of the presidential Mansion, Kilka throws a grenade to open the gates, he then tells Sophia to follow him. The platoon stays back.
Kilka yells "Leeroy Jenkins!" and he crashes through the door, with Sophia in tow.
His cousin says "Well he just ran in there, didn't he? don't follow him, just set up a perimeter, and that is a historical door that he just broke, goddamnit, bull in a china shop."
Once Kilka and Sophes are inside, all these cops and the VP come out, the VP is wielding an RPG, and Kilka tells him "if you use that indoors, the whole building will fall on top of us."
Still, the VP shoots, and Kilka is like "huh, that was a very weak explosion. Oh shit; I can't move. That wasn't an RPG, it was an EMP. Can you move Sophie? My trike is completely immobilized."
Sophie answers "yes master, thanks to you building a faraday cage into me, I am not dead; but I cannot move either, also, all my communication functions are dead..."
The VP instructs the cops to cut Kilka out of his armor trike with the jaws of life, then strip him naked. Then to put him in this room. Then he tells him, "I'm gonna fuck you."
Kilka responds "I didn't know you liked to fuck men; but I like to suck dick, and to get fucked in the ass, so that's cool with me."
The VP then tells the cops to leave him alone with Kilka. They stand outside the door. They hear noises, and they ask the VP if everything is allright. The VP tells them to go defend the damn place because by this time there is a lot of shooting outside.
A few minutes later, Kilka comes out of the room naked, wearing only the VP's shoulder holster and his pistol. He finds his armor, and he gets dressed in it. He mutters, "well, the sex was fun; but you should not try to usurp the will of a people." Yet the VP cannot hear this. He is crumpled on the floor with his neck broken.
Kilka then starts clearing rooms. Because of all the shooting, nobody notices. Soon enough, he gets a Galil. After that, he finds a computer and he logs on to the video phone, then he drags the VP's body over to it, and he calls his contacts in the media. Once the dead body of the VP is seen online , the cops realize their fight is lost, and they retreat.
Then Kilka has Sophia towed to his house, so he can get her out of the battle armor.
After that, the President calls up Kilka, and he tells him "I thank you for all you have done for me; but there are a lot of people calling for your head."
Kilka answers to the president: "If you set the hounds on me, I will take a long vacation. then let's see what happens to you. Those cops will come back to kill you."
The prez then replied: "They found your DNA on his genitals, maybe we can work that angle."
Kilka replies: "Fuck you, I loved sucking his dick almost as much as I loved breaking his neck. Almost; but not quite; because breaking that asshole's neck was way more enjoyable than swallowing his cum. Although I did swallow his cum, and I enjoyed it."
As a consequence of that conversation between Kilka and his prez, Kilka received the highest medal that a civilian can receive in his country. There was also an amnesty for all parties involved in the fighting. That does not sit well with Kilka; but he can't really do much about it, or can he?
Fuckyeah, he can!
Did I take it too far with the violence and the sex? I'd like to know. Please comment. I know that the idea of a guy giving another dude a blowjob, and then breaking his neck is pretty extreme; but that's how I conceived it from the first. As I said, Kilka is bisexual. And extremely promiscuous. He has sex with a lot of men and women. And you can see my previous posts to find out why I conceived the character that way.
And just wait until you hear about Kilka's daughter, Spectra. Because she's all out fucks and all out of bubblegum, and she doesn't even like bubblegum. Bubblegum sucks.
Spectra is also extremely promiscuous, and she loves to suck dick, and to kick ass, because the apple never falls far from the tree. Kilka does not judge her for sucking a lot of dicks, or for fucking a lot of men. That would be pretty hyppocritical.
Sorry I haven't yet finished the mechanical design for the trikes. Rome wasn't built in a day, as they say. I've been going at it though; but it's really hard to do mechanical transforming design. especially when you consider that there is an operator inside the robot.
Wednesday, September 7, 2011
Sex
Ok, just so it's clear, I love fucking girls, and I don't hardly ever use condoms, and I love coming inside them. I also love to watch my semen spill out of their pussies. Don't ask me why, I just do. I fucking love to watch my cum spilling out of a woman's vagina. I get an endorphin rush from that. And I'm addicted to ejaculating inside girls because it gets me high.
I also love when I come in a woman's mouth and she swallows my semen. I fucking love that.
I also love when I come in a woman's mouth and she swallows my semen. I fucking love that.
Karen
Karen was the first girl I fucked in ES, she was a stripper at this club that used to be called the Luxor. I came in there drunk; because I'm not retarded. I talked to her for a while, to find out how it all worked, then we went to the VIP room. She drank all of the 7 tequila shots I bought (you get the liquor with the room), then she let me fuck her bareback, and come inside of her.
We also listened to Ricardo Arjona the whole time, and we kissed, and we had a very nice conversation. I also gave her my phone number. I'm not quite sure why she never called me back, because I did give her my number, and I know that she put it in her garter. I only know that she never did call me. Girls never call you back. Fucking bitches.
We also listened to Ricardo Arjona the whole time, and we kissed, and we had a very nice conversation. I also gave her my phone number. I'm not quite sure why she never called me back, because I did give her my number, and I know that she put it in her garter. I only know that she never did call me. Girls never call you back. Fucking bitches.
Asshole Drivers
You know what is worse than getting run over by a motorcycle? Getting a fist rammed into your face at 30 kmh plus the velocity of the fist. Even with a helmet you will die if you run into that.
He veered off at the last second, otherwise, it would have been tested empirically. Motherfucking science!
Tuesday, September 6, 2011
Chana
Chana is short for Roxanna.
She is a marera girl that I met before I met my ex. She has a bigass 18 tattoo on her shoulder. The ex is out the door now; but maybe my relationship with chana might endure.
She is a marera girl that I met before I met my ex. She has a bigass 18 tattoo on her shoulder. The ex is out the door now; but maybe my relationship with chana might endure.
Yessica
So down here in ES women are actually fairly hard to pick up. Much harder than in California, anyways, I met Yessica trhough the classifieds. She's one of those mall rats that hangs out at metrocentro. She sucked me off without a condom; but she had one for when I fucked her, then I fucked her ass. Then I fucked her again. She didn't have another condom, so she let me fuck her bareback. Her only condition was for me not to come inside her. I honored that, although sometimes, even if girls tell me that, the speed of my orgasms surprise me (and them).
Monday, September 5, 2011
These People Are Nuts
3. Julia Stiles in Cuba.
Cuba is an oppressive regime, what a fucking shocker!
2. Vampires aren't real, you fucking n00b!
Seriously? Fucking seriously? I could just stab this guy in the heart with my folder tanto, and he'd be dead. Not with a wooden stake or anything like that, just a folding steel pocket knife. Fucking eejit. If anyone ever tells me that they are a vampire, you mark my words, I will hand their ass back to them.
1.Sandra Bullock has to pay him alimony because the guy ain't shit
Ok, Sandra Bullock is a bit older than me, by like 11 years; but if I managed to have that woman as my girlfriend, or wife, I would totally hold on to her and be loyal to her till death do us part, because I could finish any verbal fight by saying "I fuck Sandra Bullock every night. Your arguement is invalid."
I mean Jesse who? Like the old west bandit? And he makes motorcycles for a living? And he cheated on an A-lister with a porn star? And now he's hooking up with some tattoo artist? Fucking EEEEEEJIT.
Just putting it all in perspective.
That asshole just doesn't know how to appreciate women. If I were as lucky as him as to bag Sandra Bullock I wouldn't so much as look at any other woman, ever again.
The eejitness of some people fucking astounds me.
Cuba is an oppressive regime, what a fucking shocker!
2. Vampires aren't real, you fucking n00b!
Seriously? Fucking seriously? I could just stab this guy in the heart with my folder tanto, and he'd be dead. Not with a wooden stake or anything like that, just a folding steel pocket knife. Fucking eejit. If anyone ever tells me that they are a vampire, you mark my words, I will hand their ass back to them.
1.Sandra Bullock has to pay him alimony because the guy ain't shit
Ok, Sandra Bullock is a bit older than me, by like 11 years; but if I managed to have that woman as my girlfriend, or wife, I would totally hold on to her and be loyal to her till death do us part, because I could finish any verbal fight by saying "I fuck Sandra Bullock every night. Your arguement is invalid."
I mean Jesse who? Like the old west bandit? And he makes motorcycles for a living? And he cheated on an A-lister with a porn star? And now he's hooking up with some tattoo artist? Fucking EEEEEEJIT.
Just putting it all in perspective.
That asshole just doesn't know how to appreciate women. If I were as lucky as him as to bag Sandra Bullock I wouldn't so much as look at any other woman, ever again.
The eejitness of some people fucking astounds me.
Little Update
Ok, so I know I haven't been writing any K&S lately. That's because I've been working on the transforming version of the trikes. I think I pretty much have them figured out. Hopefully more Kilka and Sophia within a week. Also, get ready to know Kilka's true dark side. People are gonna die. And also some other stuff that I won't talk about just yet. It involves sex; but not the kind you think. Fair warning. Oh, BTW, If you happen to have a Genesis Climber Mospeada manual, I'd appreciate it if you sent it to me. I need that shit.
Sunday, September 4, 2011
David Gumms, aka Gummy
Ok, so this asshole was always a smartass to me. One time, as we were driving in a parking lot that always has police security, he's like trying to light up a weed pipe, and I'm like "waht the fuck, are you retarded?" And he's like "This guy is just a fag." Later that month, one of my other friends threw a party. One of the girls at the party (kind of like a scene girl) lost her purse. She announced that she would give a makeout session to whoever found it. Gummy told her to go look for it in the bathroom, after that, he locked the bathroom door, and tried to rape her. I started kicking the door in, while yelling "not cool!" I was about to get my gun and shoot the lock off, when the asshole realized he'd been caught and just opened the door.
dopey smarts
It's not the poster; but the first guy rapping. If that guy comes anywhere near my daughter, I will take his head clean off. Be aware that he is a substitute teacher. When a substitute teacher has a neck tattoo, kill him.
This is why to this day David Gums and I do not see I to eye, and the next time I see him I will behead his dumbass.
dopey smarts
It's not the poster; but the first guy rapping. If that guy comes anywhere near my daughter, I will take his head clean off. Be aware that he is a substitute teacher. When a substitute teacher has a neck tattoo, kill him.
This is why to this day David Gums and I do not see I to eye, and the next time I see him I will behead his dumbass.
Marla
Marlena was a hot Puerto Rican Chick I met off like San Pablo and Ashby in Oakland. She was walking like off San Pablo near that MacDonald's and Urban Salvage. There happens to also be an Italian mafia club right around there. She lived like three blocks off there down a street I won't name.
Look, way back in the day, I dated this girl for like two years. It wasn't until two months after I broke up with her and she had a huge blowout with her mom that I found out she had been addicted to opiates the whole time we were dating, and when her mom kicked her out I let her stay at my place, because I didn't want her homeless and on the street. She started whoring herself to support her habit. Understand that there was no sex involved between us at this point. Or even any exchange of money except gas money for me to drive her to the stroll. And I would watch over her to make sure she was safe and didn't get kidnapped or anything like that. Some might say that I was pimping her; but I really wasn't. I just was emotionally invested in her, and making sure that she didn't end up dead in a ditch somewhere. How did it end? One day she left for a project in Oakland for a couple of days. She got arrested for selling drugs to support her habit. Her mom bailed her out (I had to call her mom to tell her Marla was under arrest, and her mom at first thought she was dead. I can still remember her reaction when I told her "I want to talk to you about something serious about your daughter," and her reaction was "Ay Dios mío! Is she dead?" And I was like, no; but she's been arrested). Her mom bailed her out, and they started to have a dialogue; but her mom still wouldn't let her back in the house. One night, she went batshit insane, she started insulting me, and it got me pissed off. I started drinking and got more aggressive. I told her to shut her mouth or look for another place where someone would let her stay for free. A couple of days later, she asked me to drop her off at that project again.
I didn't hear from her again for two years. She'd been arrested for slinging drugs again, while out on bail. This time they didn't let her bail out, and I wasn't about to get up in the middle of the night to open a car for her. By that point I was working construction and had an early day. I hope she got off the drugs; but I think she probably didn't. One time I saw her while driving down San Pablo hanging out with a dude, probably an actual pimp. I don't know if she recognized me, and I don't care. My car was fucking up (ignition problems, and BTW, if you have ignition problems, replace the rotor on your distributor first. If your car doesn't have a distributor, replace your pussy with a dick and a pair of balls, asshole. The only exception to the asshole clause is if you have an LS family engine, in which case you have to test every one of those coils, and they are expensive, or if it's a diesel, replace the glowplugs; but that should only be a problem at startup) so I had to pull over in front of them. Kind of uncomfortable. But they didn't approach me, and I'm pretty sure they understood that if they tried to fight me I would have shot them both.
Addiction is a hell of a thing.
Whenever I thought of her, I thought of this song:
Three Marlenas
I remember all kinds of things about her. She liked to go to White Castle, and this one pizza place I don't remember the name of; but I could drive there if I were anywhere in the area. She loved Dr. Pepper, and sour candy. She also sometimes liked to go to McDonald's. When she was nice, she was really nice, and when she was a bitch I had to yell at her not to be such a bitch. Also, she smoked a lot. At least a pack a day. I hope she doesn't get lung cancer.
One more thing about her. Just like with Crystal, when I met Marlena, she was only 17. Just about to turn eighteen; but still, 17. She told me she was 21 though. It wasn't until much later that I found out her real age, and did the math that I realized she was 17 when I first met her. Below the age of consent in California. Still, she had already fucked the football coach at her school, which got the guy fired, and while I didn't know it, she was pregnant from a drug dealer when I first met her (She didn't show. I never knew until after she gave birth) There is a girl somewhere in Oakland that has the impression of my dick on her forehead. If you see her, tell her I said hi. Also I'll adopt that girl at the drop of a hat, because she needs a father figure, and pimps and drug dealers are not it.
I think her grandmother actually adopted her, though. Still, no father figure. That is important to a kid.
I was able to weather my insecurities from not knowing my father until I was 10 years old. My brother, however, is fucking nuts. I will have to kill him if I ever see him again.
Look, way back in the day, I dated this girl for like two years. It wasn't until two months after I broke up with her and she had a huge blowout with her mom that I found out she had been addicted to opiates the whole time we were dating, and when her mom kicked her out I let her stay at my place, because I didn't want her homeless and on the street. She started whoring herself to support her habit. Understand that there was no sex involved between us at this point. Or even any exchange of money except gas money for me to drive her to the stroll. And I would watch over her to make sure she was safe and didn't get kidnapped or anything like that. Some might say that I was pimping her; but I really wasn't. I just was emotionally invested in her, and making sure that she didn't end up dead in a ditch somewhere. How did it end? One day she left for a project in Oakland for a couple of days. She got arrested for selling drugs to support her habit. Her mom bailed her out (I had to call her mom to tell her Marla was under arrest, and her mom at first thought she was dead. I can still remember her reaction when I told her "I want to talk to you about something serious about your daughter," and her reaction was "Ay Dios mío! Is she dead?" And I was like, no; but she's been arrested). Her mom bailed her out, and they started to have a dialogue; but her mom still wouldn't let her back in the house. One night, she went batshit insane, she started insulting me, and it got me pissed off. I started drinking and got more aggressive. I told her to shut her mouth or look for another place where someone would let her stay for free. A couple of days later, she asked me to drop her off at that project again.
I didn't hear from her again for two years. She'd been arrested for slinging drugs again, while out on bail. This time they didn't let her bail out, and I wasn't about to get up in the middle of the night to open a car for her. By that point I was working construction and had an early day. I hope she got off the drugs; but I think she probably didn't. One time I saw her while driving down San Pablo hanging out with a dude, probably an actual pimp. I don't know if she recognized me, and I don't care. My car was fucking up (ignition problems, and BTW, if you have ignition problems, replace the rotor on your distributor first. If your car doesn't have a distributor, replace your pussy with a dick and a pair of balls, asshole. The only exception to the asshole clause is if you have an LS family engine, in which case you have to test every one of those coils, and they are expensive, or if it's a diesel, replace the glowplugs; but that should only be a problem at startup) so I had to pull over in front of them. Kind of uncomfortable. But they didn't approach me, and I'm pretty sure they understood that if they tried to fight me I would have shot them both.
Addiction is a hell of a thing.
Whenever I thought of her, I thought of this song:
Three Marlenas
I remember all kinds of things about her. She liked to go to White Castle, and this one pizza place I don't remember the name of; but I could drive there if I were anywhere in the area. She loved Dr. Pepper, and sour candy. She also sometimes liked to go to McDonald's. When she was nice, she was really nice, and when she was a bitch I had to yell at her not to be such a bitch. Also, she smoked a lot. At least a pack a day. I hope she doesn't get lung cancer.
One more thing about her. Just like with Crystal, when I met Marlena, she was only 17. Just about to turn eighteen; but still, 17. She told me she was 21 though. It wasn't until much later that I found out her real age, and did the math that I realized she was 17 when I first met her. Below the age of consent in California. Still, she had already fucked the football coach at her school, which got the guy fired, and while I didn't know it, she was pregnant from a drug dealer when I first met her (She didn't show. I never knew until after she gave birth) There is a girl somewhere in Oakland that has the impression of my dick on her forehead. If you see her, tell her I said hi. Also I'll adopt that girl at the drop of a hat, because she needs a father figure, and pimps and drug dealers are not it.
I think her grandmother actually adopted her, though. Still, no father figure. That is important to a kid.
I was able to weather my insecurities from not knowing my father until I was 10 years old. My brother, however, is fucking nuts. I will have to kill him if I ever see him again.
Friday, September 2, 2011
Pictures
Ok, I saw this collection of pictures on the internet, and although you often see an interesting picture or demotivational poster, or even a funny lol cat, this is the most interesting collection of pictures I've seen yet, and the pictures don't really have anything to do with each other; but I'm gonna comment on each of them. Here's the page I'm referring to:
Interesting pic collection
1. Hey, look at me! I was swimming in the ocean and I found a sexy ass.
2. She's kissing him; but he's just trying to eat her.
3. Just put your booze in a drawer, dumbass, why go through all that trouble to hide it?
4. Vladimir Putin is badass. I'm not even sure why this was included in the collection, except maybe for his badassness.
5. Ok, even if the guy was a clown (which I have no way of knowing if was or not), and his fellow clowns came to pay their respects, they could have done it out of costume.
6. Panda walks into a restaurant, he orders, he eats; but when the waiter brings him the bill, he pulls out a gun and kills him. The owner is like "what the fuck!" And the panda is like "I'm a panda, look it up." So the restaurant owner pulls out his dictionary, and looks up panda. It says "Panda: Asian bear easily recognized by it's distinctive black and white coloring. Eats shoots and leaves."
Remember kids, he who would pun would pick a pocket, as the saying goes, so when in my vecinity, guard your wallet at all times. Fair warning.
7. I am sick and tired of these motherfucking snakes in my motherfucking head.
8. It's the Sigüanaba, and she's wielding dog-chucks. We're fucked. Game over, man.
9. I fucking hate African love birds with the white hot heat of a thousand suns. Don't ask me why. I just do.
10. It's one thing to have a cat try to steal your motorcycle. It's quite another to have a gang of cats succeed at it.
11. Staying frosty at the concert.
12. Staying not too frosty at the beach.
13. NOS rules! You know when you purge the bottle before a drag race. That's the definition of awesome. For illustrative purposes for those of you who don't know what I'm talking about, here's this vid:
Camaro purging NOS
Now if anyone said to my face that that's not awesome, I would punch them in the dick before whipping out my dog-chucks.
14. That's one sick taxidermist.
15. Yeah, cops are stupid. Duh!
16. Spiderman, he does anything a commuter can.
17. I am sick and tired of these motherfucking snakes on my motherfucking dog.
18. Blondes. Not smart; but I still love them. I probably love them for not being smart, too.
19. If you're gonna be showing your tits anyways, why bother covering up the nipples?
20. See, this chick doesn't bother covering anything in front of her daughter, or her father. That's gangsta.
21. You got a lot of plaque there, let me floss your buttcheeks.
22. Oh come on dude, just take a strong drink of liquor, and drink it like a man, instead of making a spectacle of yourself.
23. Ok, if you are showing off your buttcheeks, other than at the beach, someone is gonna slap them. If it were me, I'd be biting them in that pic.
24. I would kill for a car like that, and the people that own it are abusing it.
25. You better hope you kill that guy, otherwise he's gonna come back and torch you, your family, and your house, then he'll salt the earth so that nothing grows on your property for 100 years.
26. Real sexy dude. In case you didn't notice, I'm being sarcastic.
27. Nice phone.
28. Nice ass.
29. Nice dog.
30. Nice bike.
31. Nice Jakuzzi
32. Nice elephant orgy.
33. Ok, if you can get a chick to give you a blowjob while all your friends are watching and posing for a pic, that's the definition of pimp.
34. O hell no! I don't care if your high jump champion. Get in my belly!
35. This is my science fair experiment. It demonstrates that putting a huge phallic thing in front of my crotch will get me chicks.
Dang, that was a lot of pics; but we got through them.
Interesting pic collection
1. Hey, look at me! I was swimming in the ocean and I found a sexy ass.
2. She's kissing him; but he's just trying to eat her.
3. Just put your booze in a drawer, dumbass, why go through all that trouble to hide it?
4. Vladimir Putin is badass. I'm not even sure why this was included in the collection, except maybe for his badassness.
5. Ok, even if the guy was a clown (which I have no way of knowing if was or not), and his fellow clowns came to pay their respects, they could have done it out of costume.
6. Panda walks into a restaurant, he orders, he eats; but when the waiter brings him the bill, he pulls out a gun and kills him. The owner is like "what the fuck!" And the panda is like "I'm a panda, look it up." So the restaurant owner pulls out his dictionary, and looks up panda. It says "Panda: Asian bear easily recognized by it's distinctive black and white coloring. Eats shoots and leaves."
Remember kids, he who would pun would pick a pocket, as the saying goes, so when in my vecinity, guard your wallet at all times. Fair warning.
7. I am sick and tired of these motherfucking snakes in my motherfucking head.
8. It's the Sigüanaba, and she's wielding dog-chucks. We're fucked. Game over, man.
9. I fucking hate African love birds with the white hot heat of a thousand suns. Don't ask me why. I just do.
10. It's one thing to have a cat try to steal your motorcycle. It's quite another to have a gang of cats succeed at it.
11. Staying frosty at the concert.
12. Staying not too frosty at the beach.
13. NOS rules! You know when you purge the bottle before a drag race. That's the definition of awesome. For illustrative purposes for those of you who don't know what I'm talking about, here's this vid:
Camaro purging NOS
Now if anyone said to my face that that's not awesome, I would punch them in the dick before whipping out my dog-chucks.
14. That's one sick taxidermist.
15. Yeah, cops are stupid. Duh!
16. Spiderman, he does anything a commuter can.
17. I am sick and tired of these motherfucking snakes on my motherfucking dog.
18. Blondes. Not smart; but I still love them. I probably love them for not being smart, too.
19. If you're gonna be showing your tits anyways, why bother covering up the nipples?
20. See, this chick doesn't bother covering anything in front of her daughter, or her father. That's gangsta.
21. You got a lot of plaque there, let me floss your buttcheeks.
22. Oh come on dude, just take a strong drink of liquor, and drink it like a man, instead of making a spectacle of yourself.
23. Ok, if you are showing off your buttcheeks, other than at the beach, someone is gonna slap them. If it were me, I'd be biting them in that pic.
24. I would kill for a car like that, and the people that own it are abusing it.
25. You better hope you kill that guy, otherwise he's gonna come back and torch you, your family, and your house, then he'll salt the earth so that nothing grows on your property for 100 years.
26. Real sexy dude. In case you didn't notice, I'm being sarcastic.
27. Nice phone.
28. Nice ass.
29. Nice dog.
30. Nice bike.
31. Nice Jakuzzi
32. Nice elephant orgy.
33. Ok, if you can get a chick to give you a blowjob while all your friends are watching and posing for a pic, that's the definition of pimp.
34. O hell no! I don't care if your high jump champion. Get in my belly!
35. This is my science fair experiment. It demonstrates that putting a huge phallic thing in front of my crotch will get me chicks.
Dang, that was a lot of pics; but we got through them.
Sniping
So one of my brothers actually told me that he was gonna kill me sniping style. Fucking recockolouos. He knows fuckall about guns, and around here, where the fuck would he sn snipe me from? The answer is "nowhere" I know from what he's told me about guns that all he's told me about them is based on FPS's, or just his own made up bullshit. I know how sniping works. He's never fired a single shot out of a gun.
Not too important if you are just playing FPS's; but slighthly more important if you are threatening someone that actually knows how to do long distance shooting.
My preferred rounds are the .308 and the .300 Magnum BAR with BOSS. I actually have never fired the .300 Magnum yet. I'm actually a little scared of it, and trying to sort out the ammo.
Also, I'd give my eyeteeth for an M-1 Garand.
For pistols, I like the HK- PS9 in .45, the Deawoo DH-40 with it's fucking excellent triple action triger, and the taurus 7 shot .357 with compensator.
My brother is an asshole, and if he tries to engage me in a fucking sniper battle, he will die, and I will not even try to snipe him. That would be retarded. There is more than one way to skin a cat. I'd probably not even use a gun. If I absolutely had to, which I never will, I would probably kill him with the bowie. Dude knows fuckall about guns, and this
is my damn house. Period.
Not too important if you are just playing FPS's; but slighthly more important if you are threatening someone that actually knows how to do long distance shooting.
My preferred rounds are the .308 and the .300 Magnum BAR with BOSS. I actually have never fired the .300 Magnum yet. I'm actually a little scared of it, and trying to sort out the ammo.
Also, I'd give my eyeteeth for an M-1 Garand.
For pistols, I like the HK- PS9 in .45, the Deawoo DH-40 with it's fucking excellent triple action triger, and the taurus 7 shot .357 with compensator.
My brother is an asshole, and if he tries to engage me in a fucking sniper battle, he will die, and I will not even try to snipe him. That would be retarded. There is more than one way to skin a cat. I'd probably not even use a gun. If I absolutely had to, which I never will, I would probably kill him with the bowie. Dude knows fuckall about guns, and this
is my damn house. Period.
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