Ok, my mother died back in 2005. That was the same year my daughter was born. She left my brother and me this old house, so the plan was that I would give him power of attorney and he would sell the damn house. But here's what happened instead:
Number 5: I don't really give a fuck about selling the house; but I'll guilt trip you forever after, also, I want $5600 out of the blue because I'm an asshole.
Ok Gustavo, You can just keep on stepping because I'm not paying you a single red cent. I'll take your head clean off and dump you in the creek out back rather than pay you any money.
Number 4: I like to brag about fucking underage girls.
Ok Gustavo. I know you can't even get laid at a whorehouse. The people that took you there told me about that and how you got kicked out; but the only regret I have in my life is not killing you the minute you told me you fucked a four year old, or when you told me you fucked our 14 year old niece. I knew you didn't do it; but just because you bragged about it, I should have killed you. Fucking underage girls is not something you brag about, asshole.
Number 3: I like bragging about fucking all my female cousins.
Ok, fuck you Gustavo. Just fuck you. If you had that much game you wouldn't have married goatface, and you certainly wouldn't have had her in your house after the divorce.
Number 2: I want to have sex with your baby's mother.
Seriously? Is that how desperate for pussy you are, Gustavo? I am not sorry that you will never have contact with them. I am only sorry that thanks to you my father will never know his only granddaughter. I hope you are proud of yourself.
Number 1: I'm gonna snipe you.
Ridiculous. You know fuckall about guns Gustavo. I design guns; but I wouldn't even shoot you. If you dare come here you will most certainly die, and it will not be by being shot. I can assure you of that. Sniping is not like in first person shooters, dumbass.
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